The REAL Dilemma

I was on a run with a friend yesterday and something came up about lard. Pig fat. Friend (who is a purveyor of quality lard in her homemade tamales) sighed and said, "Pigs make me sad."

I briefly attempted to figure out the context but then asked her to clarify.
She said it made her sad that she likes pork products so much since pigs are such friendly, intelligent creatures.
Do you feel the same about cows? I ask.
Well, yes, she replies.
But what about fish?
Oh, I am totally fine eating fish! she says with enthusiasm, there's nothing cute about fish!
Uh, huh, I say.

So, I query, could we say that you are a 'cute-itarian' in your food choices?

I give us props for continuing to run in spite of breakdown giggling.

Yes, she cries, that's it! I am! I am a cute-itarian! Which is also why I won't watch the Sopranos anymore. There's nothing cute about any of those characters!

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